First off, I will admit I do like some of her songs. Me Against The Music and Toxic are old favorites, and I do quite like Till The World Ends.
Never the less, I have some huge problems with her as an artist and a performer. In fact, I don’t think she should be considered one at all.
Number one, she barely writes any of her music. The few songs she has written were co-writes. In fact, Kesha wrote Till The World Ends.
Number two, I’m not even aware if she has any talent for singing. Like, what would her voice sound like with out the auto-tunes? I’m surprised she hasn’t used that as a lame excuse for all her lip-synching, which brings me to number three.
HOW CAN YOU LIP-SYNCH SO MUCH? Like, it is disgraceful. Even though it is clearly not true, being a world wide music artist should be humbling - to have so many people around the world love you. And you can’t even fucking even sing for them when they come to your show? Which brings me to my penultimate two points.
I’ve been reading that in most of her shows, she has no choreography. She has hairography. Meaning, she mostly walks across the stage, flips her hair, walks back, and flips again. Or more specifically, in a clip from one of her recent shows I watched, stands in a cage (a cage only with enough room to stand), bends her knees about two or three inches, unbends, and flips hair. Wowowowowowow that must be worth the THREE HUNDRED AND FUCKING SEVENTY SOMETHING DOLLARS SHE WANTED TO CHARGE FOR HER FEMME FATALE TOUR TICKETS.
Really? $370 dollars for lip-synching and hair flipping? Boy, I should go into show biz. You know, I’ve heard the rebuttal that when you go to a Britney show you expect the lip-synching and all that, and if you’re willing to pay for that, that’s fine. But isn’t it a little sad?
Okay, going back to the being humbled thing, there’s one last thing I wanna add. My friend’s brother works as a personal attendant in Vegas, and he was “lucky” enough to work for her while she was staying there. Now, I don’t remember when this was, so maybe it was during that period of time Brit lost her mind (although I do think it was before that), but she was a total cunt to him. I don’t remember exactly what my friend told me, besides that fact, that fact she walked around naked with him in the room, and the fact she left him no tip. Maybe the nude sneak peak was her form of tip?
So, yeah. When I said she should be considered a performer, maybe I should have said she doesn’t deserve to be one. I mean, what makes her special really? One thing. Lucky. Lucky enough to have been on The New Mickey Mouse Club.